Please note, I was not compensated for this review but was provided a complimentary copy.
No Maybe Baby: My Journey through Infertility by Marcy Hanson.
This book is about the author’s real life struggle to conceive and the process of adoption. A taboo topic to many, the author goes into detail about her life during a really difficult time.
As I write my humble opinion of this book, keep in mind that my husband and I currently do not have children, therefore I cannot personally identify with the author’s struggle. I am merely reading/reviewing this as a completely impartial reader.
The first third of the book was hard for me to identify with and understand. It was quite negative and daunting to read. I think this can be a really taboo topic for various legitimate reasons. I feel that my personal opinion may differ from the authors. However, I respect that as this is being brought to light and am thankful that more resources are available and people are sharing their experiences.
I just felt frustrated when I read the beginning of the book. It reminded me of a common experience at work. Occasionally, we will get cancer patients and I’ve noticed that everyone handles that diagnosis different. Some look at it as a challenge, some look at it as a time to reflect on all that they have and love, some use it as license to be a jerk to everyone, some use it as a reason to see the negative in everything, and some use it as a reason to see the positive in everything.
I get that having cancer is terrible, painful, and takes over your life. I’ve seen that happen before my eyes. However, that does not negate all of the blessings bestowed upon you. I felt that because of infertility, everything in her life was tainted and would never be the same or of value until she became pregnant. The author had been blessed beyond measure in many other areas of her life and yet those fell to the wayside. I would have liked to read and understand more about her relationship with God, her husband, and her family and feel that if there was more background to her life it may offer more understanding about why this consumed her in the capacity in which it did.
However, once the author begins to describe her adoption process, the book takes a very positive turn. I think my tears are still on those pages. Her honest account of adopting a seven-year-old girl named Hannah is truly heartwarming. I appreciated her graceful explanation of the ups and downs of the process. It was also interesting to get a peek into someone’s life during the first few hours and days of bringing home an older adopted child for the first time. She shares their first triumphs as a family and their first struggles.
Reading her book led me to check out her blog (http://nomaybebaby.blogspot.com) as well as some other infertility stuff. I have had some friends struggle in that area and now feel better equipped to support them. Reading her book and blog made me more aware of the thoughts and feelings that come with infertility.
I recommend her book, blog, and resources for those that are walking this journey as well as those that have someone close to them that is also having the same experience. Just having an idea of what their uncensored thoughts and feeling might be will give you a better idea of how to be there for them when they need you most.